When my husband and I were preparing for marriage, the priest assisting us suggested that we commit to one date night out a month. He admitted that it could be hard and a bit expensive because of babysitters, but he was adamant that it would be worth it. And he was right. We needed those nights out of the house.

But they weren’t enough on their own. Over the past seven years, we have gradually created the “Rule of One.” This rule recognizes that couples need to reconnect regularly if they want their marriage to be healthy and happy. Monthly dates alone aren’t going to cut it—a lot can happen in a month, and you just can’t leave it all to be hashed out during your date night. Take a look at the three parts of the Rule of One to see how they will help you refresh your marriage.